Today has been a reflection day. I often have these days where I think about my trials and everything that has happened in my life to bring me to this point. It was also kind of an emotional day; which mostly happened just because of my reflections. Cody left for training today in Tucson, just for two weeks, so not that long. In the eternal scheme of things, two weeks is nothing. When I woke up this morning I had deja vu; well actually I felt like that all day. I kept thinking about what it felt like when he left for the academy almost year ago. I know two weeks does not even compare to three months but I still couldn't help but think about it. I'm so glad that he is finally doing what he loves and he has my full support but it gets hard saying goodbye to him. So I'm thinking about all of this along with the fact that I'm living somewhere new, far away from family, and we are all still adjusting and there absolutely nothing to do in this town besides go to the dollar store and wondering what I can do to keep me sane until he gets back. Then this afternoon we decide to watch Legacy with the kids...church history and pioneers have a soft spot in my heart so I cry every time I watch this movie anyway, but today I was already keeping my feelings in check, trying to be the strong wife and mom, and trying to figure out why I was feeling such a wreck inside anyway. As I sat there with my husband on my right, my baby on my lap and my two other children to my left, I realized (for the umpteenth time) that my family is my whole life. I am so thankful for the knowledge of eternal families. I realized that my husband may be leaving for two weeks but I know he's coming back. I will see him soon. I get to talk to him every night. I could say goodbye and know that I'll see him again; instead of saying goodbye wondering if I'll ever see him again. After everything that has happened in the last year, my emotions/realizations/thoughts/reflections just came to a point and I thought how blessed I am. I have realized time and time again that if we are doing what we are supposed to nothing happens by coincidence. We will be taken care of. Everything that has happened to our family has been for a reason. Some reasons I understand now and some I don't. But as I sat there with my family, I thought to myself I can do whatever I am suppposed to do and have the strength to do it because I am blessed. I am being watched over and my family is being watched over whether we are together or apart. So even if all I have is the dollar store to venture out too with the kiddies, so be it. Even if I am running low on patience and smiles, I'll keep going because my kids are worth it.
Plus, two weeks really isn't that long, right? :)
5 years ago
4 comments:
I know it must be hard to be by your self in a strange town, but you have the right attitude and I hope there are members of the church that will help you also. you will help get through all of this and Someday hopefully you will love where you are living.
If anybody understands about how hard it is to be away from family, it's us!! I too am glad Cody is finally getting to do what he likes!! He is blessed to have such a supportive and loving wife. It is often the mom who has to keep things "normal" at home for everyone--it can get exhausting--Lance travels a lot for work and he's always gone for 1-2 weeks overseas, but you are right in that there is comfort in knowing he'll be back, and I get to talk to him on the phone sometimes--hang in there!! We think of you and pray for you often-love you!!!
Chelsea,
How fun to find your blog. I didn't know. I just loved this post. I am glad you guys are having good experiences there. The apostles are telling us we need to give ourselves time to think and reflect, so even though it is emotional, I always find it very refreshing.
I'm glad you shared!
Chels! Remember I can call you that bc it makes me feel cool ;) I love reading your blog.
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